I had an intense baby dream. I was in my bathtub taking a shower. The warm water was streaming down in a rhythmic spray. I felt a sudden and strange contraction in my belly. It felt almost violent. I was compelled to give birth to the baby then and there. I panicked since the baby was only 6 months old in my belly. If she were born now, she would be premature. I was scared. The contractions kept coming in waves. The baby wanted to come up through my chest and out of my mouth. My right arm became transparent and it opened up like some horror movie. A hazy blur of veins, skin, and bone. Another contraction skook my insides and I could not force away the feeling. I saw the baby come out through my arm. She was encased in a translucent sac, almost animal-like. I watched in awe, terror, and anticipation. I held the baby in my arms as the water kept pouring down gently on our bodies. I held my daughter lovingly, carefully. I held her under the water and washed her skin and hair. I was so worried that she might drown in this water. I kept her close to my own skin. And then. I saw how incredibly beautiful and precious she was. Perfection. Small and just darling. Safe and healthy. I could not help but smile. I felt my heart widen and glow in this miraculous feeling of motherhood. I cradled her in my arms. I started to bring her within reach of my left breast so that she could be nursed and nurtured. And the dream ended.
I was so surprised and delighted to find a letter from Tricia in the mail today. She is so wonderful...I wished I knew her even better. Always beautiful in a quiet way.
I also received the brand new Tori Amos : Lyrics book I won off Ebay. Only $16.00 altogether. What a bargain. The book is stunning. I love her words, her everything.