The creativity and originality of others FLOOR me. So much verve and fire. It is inspiring. I could only wish to be THAT talented. Oh, envy and admiration intermingle in bittersweet flavors.
M. doesn't understand the purpose and need for personal websites that spill forth one's heart and soul. He doesn't understand why on earth people would want to have every detail of their lives on display for anyone and everyone to view.
And you know what? I always DO wonder the same thing. We spend hours upon hours describing every scrap of our minds and actions. We spend hours designing what we hope to be the perfect layout. It IS kind of crazy when you think about it from a certain point of view.
I wonder why I do it. And well...here is my list:
-Journaling is so easy and incredibly fun on the computer.
-I like having this cyber-journal and soon-to-be-website.
-I love sharing what I go through and think about with others.
-I crave acceptance from others.
-I crave compliments from others.
-I just desire recognition.
-I secretly love attention.
-I love telling others how awesome my husband and son are to me.
-I love meeting new people.
-I love making friends.
-I just adore this type of community, where we all love to write and share and experience.
-Designing and writing a journal and site sparks my creative juices.
-I am a voyeur of other's lives. I want to read and visualize what others go through daily...their own passions and hates and loves and losses.
I just need this space.
But I do think how much more time I would have if I DIDN'T do this...if I did not read online journals and keep one and spend practically all my free time doing something related to personal sites. I have even fantasized about ENDING my journaling and ceasing to read other journals. To just STOP COLD TURKEY. I ponder whether I could do it.
And I know I can't.
At least right now I can't.
I need this now.
It is fun.
I have a good time connecting with myself and others.